I haven’t drank in years but if I remember the left hallway always tastes better.

This is getting seriously depressing, I knew who it was before I checked the username. You posted that you were going to quit drinking after the superbowl, right? I believe the superbowl is over.

You have a serious problem, but not an unsurmountable one. Get help if you need, I think you do. You can do it!