Checking people over.

Used to be a nurse’s assistant, among other jobs. So I have the unnerving habit of eyeballing everyone I know and asking them questions when they show even a hint of difficulty.

I see something on their arm, I’m likely to be reaching for them before I stop to think to ask permission. Luckily, I don’t do it with strangers because I hate touching or being touched when I don’t know the person, but it gets plenty of eye rolls from the people I do know lol.

Skin check!

Oh, I see you holding your belly, when did you last move your bowels?

Then again, some of them are fine with it.

My buddy, Spider, the last time he had a big party, he showed up the next day, said he went a little crazy, stood up and whipped out his dick. It was abraded, but otherwise intact and with no signs of infection. And yes, before I could stop myself, I was leaning forward and looking closely.

Because it was Spider, he wiggled it at me and said, in a squeaky little voice “hello Mr sasquatch, do you want a kees?”

I love that guy, but I slapped his balls for that one